SPEAKER_01 0:00

I hit a hundred pounds lost this week. Oh my god. Which is beautiful, unlike most plus size shirts.

SPEAKER_02 0:08

Yeah. Why am I doing profound emotional healing in a rhinestone cold shoulder top?

SPEAKER_01 0:16

And why is Winnie the Pooh involved?

SPEAKER_02 0:20

Great questions. No answers. Just trauma and polyester. Born This Way starts now. Welcome to Born This Way, a weight loss podcast exploring the identity whiplash of untangling a lifetime of body shame. And realizing a smaller size doesn't quiet a bully in our heads. So pull up a chair. Preferably not anything plastic or a rickety stool.

SPEAKER_01 0:52

A quick note: we're not doctors or dietitians. The show is for entertainment only, and all views are personal and our own. So don't sue us. Please.

SPEAKER_02 1:20

Highs, lows, thrills, chills, spills. Quite literally spills. What?

SPEAKER_01 1:28

Did you fall down?

SPEAKER_02 1:31

No, like I just, you know, spilled some things. I'm sure I spilled at least a couple other.

SPEAKER_01 1:38

Oh, are you okay? Did you fall down yesterday? Oh, did you spill something?

SPEAKER_02 1:43

Luke did have a spill last night. I got back from my I went for a bike ride last night, and when I got back, Luke was laying on the floor in the kitchen. And I was immediately knew he had something had happened.

SPEAKER_01 1:54

You know, not a drink spell, a spill spell.

SPEAKER_02 1:57

Oh no, this was a spill, yeah, a real spell. Like a if you're a if you're a mother of particularly of boys that are close in age, there's just not there's like a cap of like maybe 90 seconds to two minutes where they can be left alone together without nearly killing each other.

SPEAKER_01 2:12

I could imagine.

SPEAKER_02 2:13

Yeah. Although this one really did seem to be an accident. And I know that because Don, who is Luke's like number one hype guy, right? Like remember, Luke had like a real he loved his sixth grade basketball career. Um so Don takes film of them when they're pla practicing, so Luke can watch the film later, right? So Don just happened to be taking film at the time. They were over at the basketball court just across the yard, and uh Luke took a spill. And so when I when I walked in and saw Luke on the floor, then Don comes in and is like, I I have film. It wasn't me. I it wasn't my fault. I'm like, great, you actually have video evidence this time, because you know, usually it's it absolutely 99.9% of the time ends up in a he said, he said, and then I gotta be the fucking arbiter. It's maddening. Sure. Anyway, yeah. So yeah, this actually was kind of cool. We had film, so I could say, oh, okay, yeah. This was this truly was a no fault. What do you just eat it? Uh they were playing basketball, and well, first of all, okay, can I just can I perception check this with you? Because I think I'm right. Always. I'm like, hey, maybe, maybe when we're playing basketball on like a blacktop court at a school, maybe we should wear like closed shoes, like not our Yeezy slides, which is what both of them were wearing. They're Yeezy slides to play basketball. Not even crocs that have the sport mode on them, so they'll stay on. Like they're full on Yeezy slides. I said, Luke, proper equipment next time might might have prevented this. But yeah, he like evident in the video. Oh yeah, he like skidded like across the, you know, oh god. Yeah, it wasn't great. Wasn't great. But it wasn't killing today. He's fine.

SPEAKER_01 4:01

You know, resilient little things.

SPEAKER_02 4:03

They really are. Thank God. If that happened to me, I'd be out, I'd be laid up for two weeks easy.

SPEAKER_01 4:12

I think that all the time, especially when it was at my biggest weight, if I would like stumble. I was like, if I get hurt, much very done. Easy if I fall, we're taking the whole house with me. Literally, figuratively.

SPEAKER_02 4:31

Yeah. So yeah, they're pretty resilient.

SPEAKER_01 4:34

How's your week been? I'm so sorry. Here, I have some ASMR for the show before we get into it, ready?

SPEAKER_02 4:41

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 4:41

Not the chewing, hold on.

SPEAKER_02 4:43

My god, that sounded like a fucking commercial. How about it? Esquat Chrissy. Are they looking for content creators? Brand awareness, right? You just said brand awareness and it immediately tickled my brain. First of all, how was your week? I need to know that first, but then I need to come back to brand awareness because it made me think of something.

SPEAKER_01 5:01

Thank you for asking. It was good. It was fine. I've settled into 40. Um it's busy all the time. I think I'm my mindset is moving toward like a instead of it trying to run away from how hard stuff is right now, just like leaning into it and not trying to make myself miserable and letting things kind of happen. Trust in life. Just the process. Trust the process that something's gonna ease up soon, but it hasn't happened yet. So I just I get up every day and do some laundry and do a lot of other things. And but I've been feeling um, you know, I'm past my I think I'm in the luteal phase or whatever. I've also been paying more attention to that. I realize that that shit impacts me a little bit more. I'm like, why do every month I I was like every time around the beginning of the month, I'm like super hungry, I'm super bitchy, and how did I I'm 40 years old and I'm just putting that together. You said something about brand awareness.

SPEAKER_02 6:04

Yeah. And you sent me a a couple of uh ticker talkers this week, and I was like, oh shit.

SPEAKER_01 6:10

Oh my gosh. Yes, yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 6:12

So what's the name of the brand? So Lisa sent me a ticker talker of a woman who is a like I she I don't know if she's a plus size, like fashion influencer. Yeah. But she was trying on some like active wear, like some inclusive plus size active wear.

SPEAKER_01 6:31

Yeah. Her name is Samira.

SPEAKER_02 6:34

Samira, that's right.

SPEAKER_01 6:35

Yeah, she's in appears to be an influencer, content creator.

SPEAKER_02 6:38

And she was trying on some like plus size activewear from like a size inclusive clothing company, right?

SPEAKER_01 6:44

She's doing a try-on, she's promoting a brand, and she's like, hey, look, this goes up to 7X. Like, she's so excited. I I think she's probably like a, I don't know, her size three or four, but like 7x is quite inclusive. Oh, yeah, for sure. So I saw that and was like, cool. Yeah, I wish I had had that at some point. Wish I I would like to buy that now. Like I'm still in those sizes. Did you watch the other TikTok I sent you?

SPEAKER_02 7:13

Yeah. So I loved this one. I love these, I love these size inclusive clothing places because one of the things that I have perpetually said is, you know, it's not like I think a lot of people think that fat people just like aren't fashionable or we just want to hide and like frumbi clothes, right? And I like I legit believe this to be true that for many of us, it's because the shit that's out there for biggins is not cute or flattering or not available to us, like very, very rarely. Yes, yes.

SPEAKER_01 7:48

I remember when Eloquie first came out and I was ecstatic. And then it went away for a long time. There was a time not long ago where there was really not a lot of brands that came above an XL. Yeah. And even now it's hard to find. Like, I can't go to like on Amazon. Uh maybe now I'm just being able to go into like an XXL, but I really need a true 2x or 3x or have in the past. Can I play this ticket? Let's watch Samira. So the brand, I don't know if you can see the comments. Holy moly. This influencer posts about she's doing, you know, uh affiliate marketing or partnership or whatever. Says size large to 7x, and don't ask me about no medium or small, because this is not for y'all. And that is what have you seen these comments? I've already yes, uh small and medium so not inclusive. You're right. So the what happened was that people got upset by this because this brand only carries large through 7x. And it made people mad. And it said, like, how so not size inclusive. Small and medium are accessible everywhere else, but people are upset that this brand is only making plus size clothes. So this comment section is really interesting. We'll play a clip of somebody, a thin person, talking about this, but some of the comments are this comment section can't be real. Are y'all actually dead ass complaining about the lack of small mediums?

SPEAKER_02 9:16

And then the picture with it too is just so chef's kiss. Great.

SPEAKER_01 9:21

Right. And it it says if this, if it's that serious and you want a smaller, medium, trifabletics, Walmart, Target, Brandy, Lulu, Skim, Jitty, Aloe, Jim's up, refined, old navy, Halara, Bubani, allure at Sheen, glow mode, body by Gia, Savage Benty, Airy, Nike, Adidas, Wonder, Active, Need I Go, Fuck On. Come on. Why that one was so great. That one's so good. Okay, so we'll play the clip that I first heard when I heard about this because we would love to get y'all's take on this.

SPEAKER_00 9:53

Because skinny people yearn to be oppressed, and it's something that's always confused me because you don't need to act like that. Anyways, um, I saw that Samira posted for this one brand that carries up to a 7x, and I went to their website, their smallest size is a 1x. So I would argue that that is a size-inclusive brand because I don't think that inclusivity always means including literally everyone. Sometimes it means allowing other people to enter the room. Does that make sense? Like that brand is essentially opening the door for athletes that are larger so that they can wear athleisure. Yeah, they don't carry an XXXXXXXX XXXX small, like you guys are begging.

SPEAKER_02 10:40

Yeah, so she's great. First of all, I fucking love her facial expressions and tones of voice. She is like awesome. What is her twash TikTok? We'll put it in the show notes. Such a great clap back. Yeah, right.

SPEAKER_01 10:52

I first saw that video and I was like, oh, here we go. And I was like, they really can't be. Maybe it was one girl or not. The top upvoted, or however it works on TikTok, the top, the top liked comment is on there, is this is so not size inclusive.

SPEAKER_02 11:09

Oh, not size inclusive. So the smaller mediums.

SPEAKER_01 11:14

The brand is Superfit Hero. Superfit Hero. Oh, look at those big queens right on the front. Okay, so this is a very size inclusive brand, and I will continue to use that verbiage because that verbiage was created because of there was a time where there was not plus sizes. What is so wrong that they need to be upset about this?

SPEAKER_02 11:38

My favorite comment was the one you read where they're like, oh, I guess you'll have to go to these 5,000 literally other stores.

SPEAKER_01 11:47

She put some good work into that comment.

SPEAKER_02 11:49

Yes. And those are just like the places we know. Think about I think about all of these like cute boutiques around town that I'd love to be able to shop at, but of course I can't, right? Well, I'm gung gloss. I'm gung gloss.

SPEAKER_04 12:02

I know.

SPEAKER_02 12:03

But like I've never been able to shop at them, right? And that so we're talking about the brands we know, and there are hundreds.

SPEAKER_01 12:10

And and what this is a plus size influencer. What do you we talked about this before? Was it the remember I brought it up and then I couldn't quote it and I'm gonna do that again? Like the bean soup. Yes, the bean soup theory on social media where it's like if you don't like bean soup and somebody's making a TikTok or an Instagram post about bean soup, you are there is an option where you can just go to another post. Scroll on by but this the theory is like people are like, I don't like beans. And it's like, okay, great, like I don't this doesn't fit me. I'm a small I bet you it won't take you fucking long when you scroll away to find something that will.

SPEAKER_02 12:53

Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_01 12:55

So it's not really a value.

SPEAKER_02 12:57

The algorithm works, yes.

SPEAKER_01 12:59

Yeah, no shit. So the fact that she's ending up in their algorithm and that they're mad about it, it makes me so sad. Shouldn't they be excited? Shouldn't they be excited that other people have shit to wear? By the way, these are hundred dollar leggings, okay? This is not cheap shit. Right. So it's like this is just like eloquie when I was they came back and then they came back like trying to be in office fancy, and I was like, girl, I cannot buy a hundred and twenty dollar pencil skirt. Right.

SPEAKER_02 13:26

But I did. Yes. Oh man, you're better than me. I couldn't.

SPEAKER_01 13:31

I wore it in my engagement photos. I they have great coupons. I probably got it for 50 bucks.

SPEAKER_02 13:36

I think hot photos. Hot photos.

SPEAKER_01 13:39

You know what sequin does? You know what I'm talking about. That sequiny.

SPEAKER_02 13:43

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 13:43

It's real good.

SPEAKER_02 13:44

Thank you, eloquie. So, so I love this conversation because like if if those people if if that's coming up in their algorithm, these are probably the same people who look for fat people TikToks to comment on, right? Like I imagine they're the ones that are out there feeling like they're the justice warriors out there to make sure that, you know, fat people feel like shit all the time.

unknown 14:04

Right.

SPEAKER_02 14:05

Let's remind them constantly.

SPEAKER_01 14:06

They're not out there looking, they're not on their page going, I just wish that I could find leggings that work. And then they see that post and they're like, oh man, see? This is digging it even deeper. They're they just created a problem that doesn't even exist in their life after they saw that post. Yes.

unknown 14:25

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 14:26

Don't even try and act like it's not. You trying to be discriminatory. I'm pissed today. This one, sometimes I try and take a more neutral stance. This is absolutely ridiculous.

SPEAKER_02 14:37

It is ridiculous. Because I I want to tell you, I've been wanting to do something like this on the podcast for a while. Kind of a PSA for our normie friends. There are things that fat people really hate. Like just or shit that fat people just have to put up with. I I've been thinking about this a lot, so I've clustered them into four categories.

SPEAKER_01 14:56

I'm so excited we're sharing this.

SPEAKER_02 14:58

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 14:59

Because it's not it's a secret. Because, oh yeah, how dare we be upset by things that are a result of our own uh behavior? Responsibility, yes. We did this to ourselves. Correct. So kind of like when we did this this airplane, and the guy somebody was saying, shouldn't it be a wake-up call if you can't fit in an airline seat? And it's like, right, oh, I'm fat. I'm at the airport checking in, and I'm like, holy sh wait, what? Oh god, you guys, you guys, I think it might be fat. You guys are not gonna believe this. But I was at the airport and they made me buy a second seat, and I realized in that moment. Right. Jeez.

SPEAKER_02 15:45

Oh man. So okay. I have put four buckets or categories together of things that your fat friends really hate. My first bucket, we're gonna get through all of them, but my first bucket is physical traps. My second bucket is clothing crimes. So we should just start with clothing crimes because we're already there. We've already talked about the bullshit there. My third bucket is social nonsense. Uh, and my fourth bucket is public humiliation mini games.

SPEAKER_01 16:17

Oh, let's get into it.

SPEAKER_02 16:18

Yeah, let's start with the clothing crimes. And here we're we've we've talked about some of these things already, right? Like size inclusivity, um, but you know, body positivity from a brand that stops at XL, right? Like that's not, you know.

SPEAKER_01 16:31

They're size eight plus size model. Yes. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 16:34

Um, or stores that call a size 14, an extended size, size 14. Um, okay, also, do y'all know where the plus size section starts?

SPEAKER_01 16:48

I'm so glad you put this in here because I just went to the Target, the Target. I just went to Target the other day. I love that you called it the Target. Some shirt. I am becoming my parents. I went to the Target and um You were searching looking for some blouses. Literally plus size um blouses. Actually, this is from that day, and this is so funny because this is another one. But here's the thing: I can only wear it up here if I stood up. This is not something I could wear out of the house because it's an XXL and I'm a smaller um for my size. I've always had like a smaller chest. I assume if I was a normie size, I would be pretty have a pretty small cup. So I have more of like a pear shape, so I can get away with a little bit smaller top than a bottom. Um, but this is not a true 2X, so I don't actually anyway. Right. All that to say I had to walk away with clothes that don't truly fit me, but I could wear on camera. Uh yes. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 17:44

Or in pictures. I have many of those too.

SPEAKER_01 17:46

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. Um, I went to the Live and Ava and Live, whatever their they have Target has their brand section, plus size mannequins, plus size girls on the ceiling above me. My safe space, right?

unknown 18:01

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:02

Okay, it's just it's five percent of plus size clothes. The other 95% was all the clearance clothes that they had just moved back to that section.

SPEAKER_02 18:10

Oh, perfect. Okay, so you thought you hit pay dirt, but then it was all the clearance.

SPEAKER_01 18:15

But it was like, yeah, we're just gonna make this back section the clearance section. So hate that, hate that for me.

SPEAKER_02 18:21

I have generally found that that plus size section is like a real thin strip between straight size, plus size maternity or scrubs. Like one or the other. It's a real small little section. Scrubs. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 18:39

Or the scrub section. They they they say they have it so that they could check that box, but they certainly don't maintain it um in a way that's makes it easy to shop there.

SPEAKER_02 18:51

Yes, absolutely. I mean, and sometimes it does feel a bit like a scavenger hunt. You know what? I because I'm me, when I go to a store, I almost always will the first person that I see say, Hey, do you have a fat girl section? And then they'll say me, right?

SPEAKER_01 19:08

Oh my gosh, their face.

SPEAKER_02 19:10

Yeah, yeah, it really is. It's a fun thing to say to them. But they're like, for who? Uh one of them I just I just remember one at Kohl's who just like ear and headlights to me. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_01 19:24

It was like they're you are like getting their people's nervous systems. If they were having a bad day or thinking about something outside of work, I'm glad you brought them back to the present moment by doing what a service.

SPEAKER_02 19:37

Uh anyway, I often have found that this section is hard to find. So I just asked, Do you have a do you have a section for fat girls? Or where's the fatty section?

SPEAKER_01 19:47

No.

SPEAKER_02 19:48

Uh yeah, yeah. I like that you mess with Normi all the time, girl. Are you kidding me? It's one of my favorite things to do. Like, I know you're thinking it. Let's just let's address it. Head on. Oh my gosh. Yeah, yeah, I love it. Okay. Um, have you ever had bought something that was that said one size or one size fits most? Most? Yeah. Most is like rude, right? Like one size fits most, but not you, Fatty. Like you're not most.

SPEAKER_01 20:22

It is. It is so inherently like insulting.

SPEAKER_02 20:30

You're not like most people. You didn't see me pick up.

SPEAKER_01 20:39

Because if you were, this would fit you no matter what.

SPEAKER_03 20:41

Under under any circumstance, this should fit you.

SPEAKER_01 20:55

So glad you brought up the one size, because I forget about that. It's worse than like a small. At least a small is telling you right away, just put it down. Listen. Nope. I see that OS and I I don't even attempt it. It is so insulting. Absolutely. Oh no. No, no. Unless it's like a fucking hat or some gloves.

unknown 21:24

Okay.

SPEAKER_01 21:29

Socks. No more one size. You're right. I absolutely hate this shit. This looks just incredible.

SPEAKER_02 21:41

Down with one size.

SPEAKER_01 21:43

Yes.

SPEAKER_02 21:44

Or like, yes, just stop. Just don't even just put a size on it then. Like, what do you think this is? A large? An extra large?

SPEAKER_01 21:52

Like, just size it. Just give us some inkling of. It's not like it's an umbrella. You should do that on accessories. No way to do that on clothes. Bodies are waiting.

unknown 22:06

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 22:15

You should see the beach towel that I use in the bathroom. Yes. The fact that I have to use a beach towel. I actually doesn't fit me anymore as of like a month or two ago. It's crazy. And I got it a couple years ago, but it was a plus size 2x or 3x um wraparound towel because I was swimming and I was the gym towels did not fit around my body, and I wanted to put something around me as I walked back into the locker room and there's a little button and the buttons don't button anymore, which is crazy. I'd love that for you. Love it. Yeah, I had to buy my own um towel to go to like a the pool or the gym.

SPEAKER_02 22:52

Yeah. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 22:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 22:53

Yeah. Right because their towels definitely aren't going to do it. Speaking of, and just like towels, right? Well, I have your robes, right? Like, so if you go to a spa, like I'm always like, if I go to a spa, I'm generally like afraid. Like I'm like if they have robes, it's like, oh god, do they have is their robe gonna fit me?

SPEAKER_01 23:12

Right. And then you're usually wet when you put it on, and then it g it's giving Tommy boy for sure. If you try and get in.

SPEAKER_02 23:18

Yeah. For me at least. For sure. My God. There's is there anything worse than I hate this after I swim and I'm in the you know, the shower the locker room at the gym, and then you're putting on your clothes when you're wet, but it's like you don't have time to like fully dry. I'm standing in this, like my god. I just realized uh I need to add something to the physical spaces list, which is gym fucking showers. Jesus. For a biggin, like those those tiny little stall showers are fucking terrible.

SPEAKER_01 23:48

They should be a little more inclusive.

SPEAKER_02 23:50

Yes, they absolutely should be. Okay, what about uh so yeah, hotel robes, like if there's a robe in a hotel room.

SPEAKER_01 23:55

Mm-hmm. Mm-hmm. That's usually cold shoulder tops. You don't like a good cold shoulder?

SPEAKER_02 24:01

I don't think so. Do you?

SPEAKER_01 24:03

Oh no, I just think they're a little date dated.

SPEAKER_02 24:06

Well, they're definitely dated, but they were like not something I was ever comfortable wearing. Like that's not I loved them.

SPEAKER_01 24:12

Because they covered up this. Oh, because they showed it.

SPEAKER_02 24:14

Yeah, they covered the under, but showed some skin. Yeah, yeah. I don't know. Tank tops, yes, or anything like a cap sleeve. Like, that's no, that's not enough.

SPEAKER_01 24:24

Oh, a cap sleeve.

SPEAKER_02 24:26

Yeah, like you little flutter cap sleeve. Let's draw attention to moving. Yeah. Let's draw attention to the I'm gonna need at least a full short sleeve. If not, I prefer a three-quarter sleeve top most of the time.

SPEAKER_01 24:39

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 24:39

I love the the cut of the three-quarters.

SPEAKER_01 24:42

Under this, I like doing it under this. Same with my knee. Yes. Because on my knee and my this arm, and I'm not advocating you should feel this way. This is just how I feel. I don't feel this way. Yes. Yeah. Yeah. You should I wear whatever you want. I uh have struggled with body image, but these are the rules that arbitrary bullshit I've created for myself that we're discussing, by the way. Um it I like it to go under here because of this. You can't see um if you're not watching this, but right above the elbow, the extra the little bat wings area. This guy, there we go. What's that called? That would be a tricep type area. Same with my knee. My knee has that. Um yeah. It's just extra, it's extra fat. I heard somebody call it yesterday. I used to have some extra love on my body. Oh, I love it. They were talking about how to get around it on TikTok because you're not supposed to they're getting really cracking down. Did you hear that? They said you cannot even say GLP1 on there anymore.

SPEAKER_02 25:35

So wow.

SPEAKER_01 25:36

Or weight loss. So uh I don't know. Our podcast hasn't gotten dinged for any violations on our episodes, so I'm surprised, honestly. But he said you could instead instead say I used to have a lot of extra love on my body.

SPEAKER_02 25:50

Got it.

SPEAKER_01 25:51

So I'm gonna adopt that.

SPEAKER_02 25:53

So it's a okay.

SPEAKER_01 25:55

I have extra love around my kneecaps, is where I'm going.

SPEAKER_02 25:58

I absolutely yes, I got I got extra love around my kneecaps as well. So I'm with you. I prefer the ones that are like I like a cropped pant for sure that goes down a little further than like a shorts, and I like that on my tops too. Let's talk about uh more clothing crimes here. What about uh floral prints that look like uh like grandma's couch or grandma's curtains, right? Like why were those straight out of des barn? Yeah, it's like why why are these why? I don't know.

SPEAKER_01 26:24

Is it is it because historically women gained weight as they age, so they just assumed.

SPEAKER_02 26:33

That's a really fucking cool take on it, if it's true. I mean, I think it's a cool hypothesis, right?

SPEAKER_01 26:38

Well, sure. The same as like we talked about Kathy Pates or overweight people playing older women in you know the arts.

SPEAKER_02 26:47

Right. Well, I mean it's almost even a trope, like I would think even for normie women, right? That it's like, oh, the you know, there's this trope about like a you the the wife gets fat after she gets married and has kids and she lets herself go. Right. So yeah, maybe.

SPEAKER_01 27:03

I've always when people talk about like losing their self physically postpartum, I'm just kind of like it's all tracked for me. I've just always I mean I had postpartum, but when they talk about that, I'm like, well, buckle up. I swear you weren't, weren't you asked a lot? I was asked all the time by older women when I was young. I remember sitting at like a doctor's appointment or it'd happen all the time on like a bus, and we'd be chatting and they'd be like, Do you have children? And I'd be like, I'm 17. Yeah, oh my god. Why are you asking me that? So I feel like I've just given mom for a lot of people. Holy shit.

SPEAKER_02 27:37

No, no one ever asked me that. People always thought I was real young. Okay, maybe because I have a fat, chubby baby face, I thought.

SPEAKER_01 27:45

Okay, I just assumed that they assumed I was older because I was overweight. So maybe that was just a personal, maybe that's an energy thing.

SPEAKER_02 27:52

I love that is so yeah, it's wild. That's wild and I love it. I actually kind of love that energy, to be honest. Okay, but yeah, so maybe so that's a potential theory, right? That that's why it's all these fucking gaudy ass floral prints where I'm like, no, pass. And then like I'll see, like, oh, like I'll see a rack of like t-shirts. I'm like, oh, cool, just a great, like looking like nice fitted t-shirt, and then it's like Winnie the Pooh or Minnie Mouse. Like, oh my gosh, I cannot believe you just said that.

SPEAKER_01 28:19

My friend Lauren went close shopping this week at uh like TJ Mac. She's making the bross rounds, and we were cracking up because she was literally held up. She had fucking Tweety Bird in the only thing. It was Tweety Bird and it was Selena. Like all these rest in peace shirts for Selena. So it'll she's like, I can either get flowers or I can get like these 90s relics, right? I mean, R.I.P. bitty bitty boom boom. We love her, but like one do we love her more than other people love her? Yeah, that's really that's so funny you said that. That is an absolute real thing. They infantilize us.

SPEAKER_02 29:05

Yes. Winnie the Pooh, are you fucking kidding me? No. No, I don't want that. Fuck out of here. All right, so that just Jesus, that just sends me. Especially Winnie the Pooh. For some reason, it's something real specific about Winnie the Pooh that is always maybe it's because it's a fucking bear with a fat belly. I don't know, but I've always got to be a good one.

SPEAKER_01 29:29

Maybe it's because he gets his fat ass. Maybe he gets his. He's carrying around his fucking honey and his arm. With his honey and his sugar, he's gets his head stuck in there. Maybe it is like this dog whistle. Oh my god.

SPEAKER_03 29:51

Did we just figure out a giant kissing? Against plus-sized people. His fucking shirt doesn't even been over his belly.

SPEAKER_01 30:08

No, it does not. Let me wear pants lovable lazy slob. Oh my god. Oh man. That's incredible. You're so right. Winnie.

SPEAKER_02 30:22

Oh my god. Yes. Okay. So yes, these crazy t-shirts, 90s relics, like fucking Tweety Bird. Are you serious? Like, come on. This is like what woman do you think is like uh whatever. I'm sure there's some woman out there who loves them. Oh, also, can we talk about like the rhinestone factory that exploded across many of these garments? Like, oh yeah.

SPEAKER_01 30:46

Just fucking be jeweled, be dazzled. Embellish that shit. It's very um, if you watch, sit down and watch like QBC. I like QBC for like the home stuff and decor sometimes. But yeah, yeah, clothes. There's some great high quality brands on there. There's some big names on there, but a lot of them when they're showing the women's stuff, the models don't match what's being their their audience is an older audience. But then they'll put models that are younger, and I'm watching them wear these clothes, and I'm like, girl, get out of that outfit.

unknown 31:22

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 31:23

Like, what are they doing? Just because they're old. They're they're they cater to an older audience, and so the the clothes do. Yeah. But they also try and sell it to everybody, and a lot of time there's some I've actually had a couple nice things from there, but more often than not, you're looking at those intense floral kind of or bohemian patterns. Yes. It's a lot of patterns, a lot of prints. Printing it.

SPEAKER_02 31:50

Very, yes, very print, very pattern. Yep. Or some like, you know, shark tooth hem or whatever, right? Like crazy weird shit.

SPEAKER_01 32:00

Where it's like this just isn't maybe it's so they can bump up the price because they're like we have to bump. It's fancy. It's embellished. We had to.

SPEAKER_02 32:08

Yeah. We had to do something for you.

SPEAKER_01 32:11

We tried. I actually just went to Lane Bryant to see how they've been because I used to struggle with that at Lane Bryant when I was younger. And I think one, I've gotten older, and two, they have really upped their game. I'm pretty impressed with what I'm seeing.

SPEAKER_02 32:23

Nice. That's good, yeah, because it used to be real hit or miss. We've recently talked about this on the show, the crop tops, like this whole cropped thing. Um, also this fashion trend of tucking the front of your shirt in, right? Like that was a thing for a while, right? I don't know if it still is because I'm bold and not fashionable.

SPEAKER_01 32:43

Have you seen when it's like 2016 mom versus 2026 mom? And it'll be like a side-by-side. And it's like a woman showing what we wear now. And it's always the left side, the 2016 is always how I dress. It's what I wear. Oh, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 32:58

You're like, oh, that's me now.

SPEAKER_01 33:00

Right. I just started figuring wearing that. And it's like leggings and tunics, right? And then the 2026 one, she's got jeans on and she's tucking her shirt into the front. And I'm like, girl, I'm not gonna do that.

SPEAKER_02 33:14

No.

SPEAKER_01 33:14

I can't do it.

SPEAKER_02 33:15

No.

SPEAKER_01 33:15

Or I don't know. No, no, no.

SPEAKER_02 33:17

And it's like, but it now they're making shirts that are like crop top or cropping them. Like they're cutting them real short. And um, you know, our what what are we are we gonna call him our mascot now? Our mascot, even his shirt doesn't cover his big bare belly.

SPEAKER_01 33:33

So our mascot. Oh my god, he's totally in a crop top.

SPEAKER_03 33:38

Yes, right. I know what I'm being for Halloween this year.

SPEAKER_02 33:48

Absolutely. Don't forget the big jar, honey. Oh, yeah, but like it's not it's not even just crop tops. Like you just described it, Lisa, like the top that you're wearing right now. I have many of them. And this is one of the one of the lovely things about remote work when you can do when you can do some remote work. Yes.

SPEAKER_01 34:09

Like there's where it ends, and this is where this I would never wear this outside.

SPEAKER_02 34:14

Oh my god, you look fucking hot.

SPEAKER_01 34:17

Flattering, actually. Jesus Christ. No, no, no, stand back up, stand back up, stand back up. No, no, no. I was supposed to stand up and look gross. I think it's still lighting up. But like I wouldn't show my belly and my sports bra nips. But like this is you're right. This is my zoom, a zoom shirt, because I wouldn't go outside. I think leggings should be treated like tights, is a good fashion rule. I break it a lot, but I don't think it should be sh your ass should be. I think it should try and cover it if you can. But if you also are my size, it's really hard to find anything. So wear your fucking leggings outside. What do I care?

SPEAKER_02 34:53

First of all, you look incredibly fucking snatched. I said that to you earlier. Like whoo! I mean, seriously, I told you to stand back up because I was like, I wasn't done. I was not done. Like she was looking fine. Um, you are like you look fucking hot. You look hot, lady. You really do. Everything about you today looks so good. Your hair looks good, your face is glowing, got that sun kiss.

SPEAKER_01 35:19

It's amazing what a shower will do.

SPEAKER_02 35:22

It really does wonders, doesn't it? Um but yeah, so crop so crop tops, anything basically that I can't pull down. So I was remote work. This is where I was. We're having a we're having a real meander today. That's great. Remote work has allowed me to wear a lot of tops that I would never like that have been in my closet and just need to be thrown away because they're too short. I won't wear them because they're too short. And they're not even crop tops, but there are tops that are cut too short that I'm not comfortable wearing them out because I can't pull them down enough that they'll cover enough. But they're perfect for remote work tops because people can't see the bottom of your right. So I have lots of those tops that are great down.

SPEAKER_01 36:00

It's so funny. We both have that. I have like a pile of them in a specific pile. It's it's only for like when I'm gonna be on the computer.

SPEAKER_02 36:08

Yeah, absolutely. Like, yep, those are my remote work shirts. Yep, I have a yep, I have a little section in my closet where they're all they all live like at the bottom left of the right.

SPEAKER_01 36:15

Okay, we must not be the only ones then.

SPEAKER_02 36:18

Absolutely, we're not. You know how I know this? I have a friend who I work with in my professional life. Um, he's he doesn't he he and I don't work at the same place, but we interact with each other. He works at a different company. But we've we've done enough work together that we've become friends. And so we were on a different meeting, like a small group meeting with just three or four of us. And so he was, he, he showed us these other three people. He's like, Oh, this I'm gonna show you my office because we were all showing our workspaces, and he's like, This is my remote work clothes pile, and it's like three shirts and three ties, and he just anytime he's just in his t-shirt, whatever, anytime it's a meeting, he just picks it up, puts on the tie, gets on the call. And then he's like, every two to three weeks, I just wash it.

SPEAKER_01 37:00

That's so smart.

SPEAKER_02 37:01

Yes, and he is also, by the way, uh, he's a big one.

SPEAKER_01 37:05

I was gonna do it. Okay. Okay. He's a big one. And I think it's actually fun because I was able to buy this two uh XXL is different than a 2XL. I don't know. It absolutely is. Uh the uh one is plus size, one is straight size. So the fact that I was able to, I was so excited, and they were like four bucks because they were also on clearance in the back. They were by the plus size section. I walked away like a few.

SPEAKER_03 37:28

Well, that worked out for you then.

SPEAKER_01 37:30

Right. Uh those remote work piles, I think for big people are like they're kind of fun because you can buy more clothes because they don't have to be fully flattering and covering things because it's only a third of your body.

SPEAKER_02 37:41

Yeah. Yeah. We haven't even talked yet about um, well, what about if one more like true clothing thing, which is event t-shirts? Like I always hated going to concerts and being like, oh, I'm not gonna get a women's shirt. Because women's size is way different. Like I I have made the mistake of seeing, oh, it's a women's size. Oh, and they have a 2X in the women's, or they have a an XXL in the women's. Um No. No, ma'am. That's all I like that. Yes, like it's not even remotely the same.

SPEAKER_01 38:13

So first of all, I can never get shirts all the time.

SPEAKER_02 38:16

Yeah, I can never get the women's shirt, right, uh, at an event. Like the cute women's shirt, I can't order because that the largest size of that doesn't truly fit like a a plus, a true plus size body. Um so then even then I have like in the event t-shirts, I have to say, like, what's your largest size for that one? And if they have a 2x, I would get it, right? Like in most of the time it would fit barely, but I would make it fit, right? So that whole thing, event t-shirts and women's. Like I was always like I would try to buy Cubs t-shirts, and the women's shirts are always cuter, but their sizes are so much different.

SPEAKER_01 38:51

Right.

SPEAKER_02 38:51

Yeah. That is we haven't even talked about um boots.

SPEAKER_01 39:00

Oh, like knee highs. Yeah, or even just some boots.

SPEAKER_02 39:05

Yeah, like ankle boots are pretty good, right? But yes, if they're going any higher than your ankle.

SPEAKER_01 39:09

You're blowing my mind because I'm like, everything you're listing, I have to, it's a big deal. Like my snow boots, I had to get ones with laces that the whole tongue comes out of so that I can even get it up.

SPEAKER_02 39:22

Yes, exactly. So shopping for boots, like if you like, first of all, they do make wide calf boots, which is what we have to purchase, right? But similar to the plus size clothing, which is never as cute and stylish as the straight size clothing, the same is true of the boots. The wide calf boots tend to also not be as cute or as stylish as the straight size non-wide calf boots are. Um, and even then, it's real hard to find wide calf boots. Not everybody has them. There are only certain places that would carry them.

SPEAKER_01 39:58

Yeah. Yeah. Hate that.

SPEAKER_02 40:00

Yeah, so yes. And I also remember like I bought a pair of wide calf boots once, and I was like, all this just looks like elastic on both sides. Like it just looks like it's a bunch of stretch. It felt so cheap, and I never really felt good about it. Yep. Yeah. It's a real drag. Yeah, so um, I wrote in my notes boots that assume all calves are decorative twigs. Because not all calves are just decorative twigs. Not these babies. Let's get through the rest of my list. I'm almost done. Okay. Um in addition to the biggest.

SPEAKER_01 40:33

We haven't even brought up the physical traps.

SPEAKER_02 40:36

Correct. Well, there are three other buckets. We're gonna just have to make each of these buckets their own episode or revisit this. I think we have to, because the the other three are large buckets as well. So the last thing is just um the the last thing that I put on my list is shapeware. Um, I I mean, listen, fat girl is the we love our shapeware, right? Like we we love a good piece of shapeware, but the emphasis is on a good piece of shapeware, because if it's not good, you get this effect of this rolling like inner tube that just becomes this like fucking like it's it's a full ass inner tube. It's really tightly yeah, it's like, oh god, I can't even breathe, I can't even unroll this thing anymore. Like you actually feel like you might be in physical danger. Yeah, you know? I can't even wear.

SPEAKER_01 41:27

I I quit the middle, the ones that didn't have the straps that would keep them poking. Oh, that would hold it up. I had to quit because I couldn't deal with that because I have not great posture and I sit a lot, and so I that's when it happens, and then you feel like kind of this flip-flip-flip there. Well, there that goes.

SPEAKER_02 41:48

Yeah, and then like depending upon I mean, there's could be a lot of flipping because some of those are real high-waisted. It's like flip, flip, flip. Oh god, oh no.

SPEAKER_03 41:59

That's when I'm like, I can't breathe. Oh god, what's happening?

SPEAKER_02 42:02

I gotta uh yeah, so shapeware has done some real crimes against humanity here. Uh and the listen, the good shapeware is worth its weight in gold for sure, right? Like I finally found, I finally found a high-waisted shapeware that I love and that has the stuff on the inside that sticks so it doesn't roll. It's but it's soft and gentle enough that it yeah, it's great. I love it. I love it. But you know, I haven't worn it in forever. Like I really haven't worn it in forever. I used to, it was a daily staple for me.

SPEAKER_01 42:33

When were you wearing it?

SPEAKER_02 42:35

Oh gosh, like a hundred pounds ago.

SPEAKER_01 42:38

I was I was gonna say, do you think it's a little bit more than a spoiler alert? Yeah, don't cut that out. Because we're not gonna get through the whole episode without not talking about that. Oh, 100%. We're done here.

SPEAKER_02 42:48

Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, yes, I've shapeware has done me dirty many, many times for sure. Um good shapeware is worth its weight in gold. So, yes, this is one bucket, people. This is just clothing crimes. So we're gonna come back to the the other three buckets.

SPEAKER_01 43:02

We are should we tease any of the buckets so that we can get input for next week and talk about it on the show?

SPEAKER_02 43:08

I did say the four buckets earlier. They're physic physical traps, social nonsense, public humiliation mini games. Those are the three buckets we have left.

SPEAKER_01 43:18

I'm really excited.

SPEAKER_02 43:19

I can't wait to talk about them. So we'll do them on next week's episode because we have one more thing that we would like to talk about.

SPEAKER_01 43:25

Yeah, I would have opened the show with it if I could have, but you have something very big to celebrate that we're gonna celebrate with you.

SPEAKER_02 43:33

We buried the lead. Yeah. Yeah. I um what's going on in your world? Yeah, girl, uh, on Easter Sunday, I stepped on my scale. And uh I have lost actually today, as of today, I've lost 101 pounds. But on Easter Sunday, I lost officially 100 pounds. 100 pounds. Pounds. And I gotta tell you that I love that. I love that.

SPEAKER_01 44:06

You thought there was a sound effect, but it was just a celebrated moment. It didn't even like load up on the screen like it does on Zoom. Cute. Yay! If I had bells. Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:20

Yeah, well. I mean, Lisa got a text that morning. Um I did the rounds, right? Like I many people in my life knew that this was close, and I know it's been kind of a thing. So I did the rounds of sharing it with people. I sent it to Biebs, of course. I mean, I couldn't wait to tell Beebs. I mean, I just, you know, it's like I'm gonna get an A plus from my trainer. I always want to impress him. I want to be, I want to emulate him in every way. He's just changed my life, you know. So I was so excited to tell him.

SPEAKER_03 44:50

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 44:51

And I was excited to tell his brother, and I was excited to tell all of my beautiful friends. And my boys who weren't here. My boys were still on spring break, so I texted my boys. So it's a kind of a fun thing my app did when I weighed in it, it threw up this photo that said, Congratulations, you've lost a hundred pounds. That's five million dollars in one hundred dollar denominations, like in a hundred dollar bills. So I've lost the equivalent of how much five million in one hundred dollar bills weighs. Isn't that cool? Wait. Oh, yeah. If you put five million dollars in one hundreds, right? The denomination is hundred dollar bills, and you had five million dollars worth of hundred dollar bills who weigh a hundred pounds.

SPEAKER_01 45:36

So you've lost five million dollars worth of weight.

SPEAKER_02 45:39

Yes.

SPEAKER_01 45:40

If you did it in a hundred dollar bills.

SPEAKER_02 45:42

If I did it in a hundred dollar bills. Yes. So I sent the boy, yeah. So I sent the boys that picture was kind of a fun way to tell them. I love that. Yeah, yeah, it was really goodly. So I yes, yes, I'm a I'm a lose it girly. Yep, I have the lifetime.

SPEAKER_01 45:57

Me too. Lose it for life. I like lose it a lot. Shout out to them for their math, for the making my lose it's like brain do that.

SPEAKER_02 46:08

Doing the heavy lifting out there for sure.

SPEAKER_01 46:10

So yeah, it was exciting. I loved it. Incredible. Have you lost a hundred pounds before?

SPEAKER_02 46:16

No, no. The most I've ever lost was 85. Yes. Yeah. So now I've surpassed that.

SPEAKER_01 46:22

Um that's wild. And uh wild. And we after the show last week, you showed me some footage of you that you found in an interview you did 100 pounds ago, and it was wild to see.

SPEAKER_02 46:36

I mean, it took my breath away.

SPEAKER_01 46:38

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 46:39

It still kind of makes me it like I felt it in my chest just now, even when I when I thought about seeing myself. Yeah, like it it does. Like it may it take it takes my breath away, like it catches in my chest a little bit. Um, because there's I have a lot of feelings about that lady. You know? I'm so grateful for her. I'm so fucking grateful. You're loving on her. She was I mean, she was in a uh a real toxic relationship and she was in a real toxic professional situation and she was trying to raise two boys and keep it all together.

SPEAKER_03 47:16

You know? Mm-hmm.

SPEAKER_01 47:20

And she did it. She's doing it. You're still doing it, yeah. You've gotten in. There's a lot of big moves you had to make to remove yourself from the things that you could. Oh yeah. Or she had to do. I love that you're looking at her with pride and not like, oh man, sometimes I see people, you know, when they a lot of like when they'd first joined the community, we were in the way that people would come in talking about themselves or the way I talked about myself then, and just with such disgust, and it's so healing. And I could see how far you've come by how you're talking about her. And that you're thinking about her emotional state, and you didn't even we talked about how different she looks, you look, but you didn't talk about that. You saw her heart and what was on her heart in that moment and how heavy it was because you lived it and you remember it.

SPEAKER_02 48:11

Yeah. One of the things that my my coach has told me, I've heard him say it many times, is uh your you your past self like did the best that they could with what they had. And you I believe it. I believe that I really was like I was I was doing the best that I could at the time with what I knew and um things, you know, I'm really starting to believe in this alignment shit, right? Like things happen when they happen because they are meant to happen that way, and they're meant to teach us something, or we learn a lesson, or it it opens a new pathway.

SPEAKER_01 48:46

Yeah, the timing is Yeah, yeah.

SPEAKER_02 48:49

So so it's cool to be able to be here and look back at her and instead of feeling well, I have to own some of this too. I have to own that I there was a part of me that I did have a little bit of shame where I thought, like, oh god, like I, you know, I wouldn't want I wouldn't want a guy that I'm dating to see this and, you know, have this thought of me. God, how did Like it's yeah, yeah, yeah. Or like how did I let myself get that way? Like feeling a lot of, you know, that kind of feeling. Um that really didn't happen too much though. I mean, it was just a little twinge. Most of it really was just like a real gr gratitude that the video exists and that I will have it. Right? Like I'll have I'll have that evidence of me.

SPEAKER_01 49:37

Because you'll forget. And before you forget, we won't forget. But you'll get further away from it. Yeah. And before you do, uh the people around you will too. People we know that are in maintenance have talked about getting further away from it and that you do start to forget.

SPEAKER_02 49:57

Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 49:58

Yeah, you start to forget what it was like. For sure. I think you saw that video and the visceral emotional reaction you had even when you were watching again with me when you showed me was is not gonna let you forget how she felt. I think you can connect to her through that.

SPEAKER_02 50:15

Yes. I'm so grateful that I have it. So grateful that it that it exists.

SPEAKER_01 50:20

I'm grateful you do too.

SPEAKER_02 50:21

And I'm I'm so full of relief that I hit the number and can stop stressing about it. Uh although I will say, uh, you know, identity shift and mindfuckery that we talk about on the show. How what do you think my first thought was when I hit 100 pounds?

SPEAKER_01 50:37

Hey, let's celebrate with a big old jog, a five-mile jog. Hell yes. And did you think about eating?

SPEAKER_02 50:50

Yeah, no, that's exactly what I did. My first thought was, oh yeah, what am I going to eat to celebrate? And then I was like, huh? We don't think that way anymore. Yeah, that's weird, isn't it? It is really wild because I it was truly a thing. And it was even a thing. I had a white knuckle a bit that day. It was Easter Sunday. Uh I know, I know that Cadbury eggs exist, and I had a pretty good read that there would be some that might be available later in the day for less than normal. Uh, and was even thinking about going and getting some. Um, and I did not, I did not do that. But you know, those man, those those old habits, they still in there. Yeah.

SPEAKER_01 51:27

And even that's even normies celebrate big milestones with food. So yes, yes, absolutely. Did you neurologically have to unwire that? You're still the rest of our lives, we'll be dealing with this on a societal level.

SPEAKER_02 51:42

Yes, yes, for sure.

SPEAKER_01 51:44

I'm proud of you. Thank you. You're just incredible.

SPEAKER_02 51:48

It's a huge milestone. So Bebe said, uh, how are you gonna celebrate your hundred LBs?

SPEAKER_01 51:53

Yeah.

SPEAKER_02 51:53

Uh we like and so we had talked about the fact that I have a I have a pair of beats and I love them. Like, I didn't realize how good they were until I bought like a poor man's pair of beats, you know, like a cheapo pair on Amazon. Sure. And I'm like, oh, the sound on these is is, you know, it's adequate at best. I mean, it's sound, so it works, but like my beats are so the sound is so rich. Yeah. But like one of them, I've had like the ear piece on it, it's got fucking piece ripped off of it, and I've been just kind of like, it's just stick it in there as best I can. So I'm gonna buy myself a new pair of beats to celebrate my hundred LBs. I love it. Yes, me too. I'm fucking excited. So good. All right, I can't wait to hear what our folks have to say about all of these clothing crimes against humanity that we've talked about today.

SPEAKER_01 52:41

Let us know because we're putting out the we're sounding the alarm to our normie friends about um y'all gonna learn today. The boots, especially the physical ones. I'm really excited about the physical ones because there was one you were you were just getting emotional. I looked over and I saw it, and I had to not laugh in the moment because I read it and it I have to tell you after we saw which one it was. It was the physical ones are so unfortunately true. Yes, like the physical spaces. Yes.

SPEAKER_02 53:12

Oh, God. Yeah. I got yes. Okay, anyway. Uh so Lisa, where can these lovely people give us their tell us their thoughts about these topics?

SPEAKER_01 53:22

You could find us um if you're listening on Spotify or you go to Spotify and comment on an episode. We see all your comments. Also, you can email us at bornthiswaypod at gmail.com. And speaking of born this way pod, that is our handle on YouTube, Instagram, and TikTok. We see comments on there too. For now.

SPEAKER_02 53:44

Until TikTok's like, wait, their entire podcast is about a bandword.

SPEAKER_01 53:48

Yeah. They're gonna be like, get out of here. You're not allowed to get lost.

SPEAKER_02 53:52

Then we're gonna have to let you know. Then we'd have to go over to YouTube with all the meanies.

unknown 53:56

No.

SPEAKER_02 53:57

You have been listening to the Born This Way podcast. Officially a hundred pounds down lighter. Um oh gosh. Just the same goddamn fuckery as always. You know, it just never ends. We're doing that. I love you so much.

SPEAKER_01 54:17

I love you. I love all of our listeners and you. Bye. Bye. You've been listening to the Born This Way podcast. Don't miss new episodes. Make sure to follow us wherever you get your podcasts, and come hang out with us on social at Born This Way Pod.